My friend Bill the traveling salesman and I were discussing the lack of interest that a knitting blog had for him and he suggested some features based on our conversations and his interests.
What to Drink when it's not Guinness -- this feature would introduce a different drink every so often and then involve extensive research to find out which local establishments served the best version of said drink (we may have come up with this idea the evening that I introduced him to mojitos at Cafe Salsa)
- What Not to Do -- this feature would chronicle what not to do to on a date as based on my experiences on dates. A place to tell the stories like the guy whose "mother" called 15 times in 25 minutes and he didn't bother to turn off the ringer and would answer as many times as he let it ring. I mentioned this idea for a blog feature to a guy I dated a few times who then tracked down the blog and was worried after each date that he would show up in an amusing story of a date gone bad. Too bad that, as our dates might have made good stories but I would never be purposely cruel (I wonder if he still reads here?). Keep in mind that any personal culpability for a bad date would be downplayed for the sake of a good story and my use of hyperbole can be liberal (the above example excluded).
- Hmmm, there was another one but after a few mojitos and a few months, apparently I have forgotten it.
It is the second category which has me writing tonight -- adventures in dating. I always say that I want a guy to have a plan, to invite you to do something rather than invite you to plan what will be done. Make a plan, extend an invitation and realize that I have veto power. If it is just the plan that is bad, I can come back with a counter offer*.
Well, I had dinner tonight with a guy. I wouldn't call it a date but if you asked him, he might have a different perspective. Not that I have given him any reason to, other than going to dinner once in a while (5 or 6 times in the past year). He wanted to take me out for my birthmonth before the month was up. We tacked down an evening that wasn't ideal since it was late night but was as good as my schedule was going to allow. He (knowing that I like a guy to have a plan) said he would think about it and get back to me. Well, today he asked what time I wanted him to pick me up -- no information on where we were going, no details at all other than that he wanted to pick me up rather than meet him. So we were going to go out to dinner and it was to be a surprise. Well, I now know the reason he wanted to drive me -- the "plan" was to drive 30 miles to a chain restaurant which I found to be pretty mediocre. I live in a town with great restaurants -- most of them independent and he choose a chain that wasn't even that special. It wasn't a special occasion place, it wasn't something unusual. You think maybe it had to be kept secret to avoid the Veto power? To think I left late night early for that. And my meal was much too salty.
Moral: When making a "plan" remember that you need to keep the veto power intact. When planning a surprise make it fantastic and worth the loss of the power to veto.
*I dated a guy for most of my twenties who was generally a pretty great guy. However, on more then one occasion he would say he wanted to take me out to dinner and he wanted me to choose the restaurant, but it wasn't that easy. I would choose and he would have some reason that we shouldn't go there on this occasion. I would suggest again and get another veto. Maybe we would even go through a third veto. But, no, he wasn't going to choose, it should be my decision. Finally I got smart, I would have him give me a list 5 places and then I would choose. Worked like a charm.